So me and Dan went to see Spider-man 3 today. It was the combination of horrible theater experience and a horrible movie.
Seriously, I think that this is the first movie ever shown at this theater cause they had no idea what was going on. We got there a little late and the previews were playing, but this is the first time I've seen that meant the theatre was pitch dark. We had to wait for flashes of lightening in the Harry Potter preview just to see where seats were let alone if they were empty. Then when we found seats the floor was covered in popcorn. I really do mean covered, there was 2 full bags in our row thrown all over, they didn't clean the place between showings. Then people who have never been in public before sat in front of us, talking all the way through and sitting straight up with their giant fros. Who sits straight up in a movie theater? YOU SLOUCH! It's common courtesy! And one of them left to purchase concessions, came back 15 minutes later and needed to be caught up on everything. Loudly. Boo! And then with 5 minutes left in the movie, they brought the house lights up! What the fricken heck? You do that in the credits, not the movie! GRRR.
And then there's the movie. I'm gone blank the text out in case anybody reads this but hasn't seen it yet, but otherwise just highlight it to read.
WHY WHY WHY??? Why did this have to be such a bad cheesy movie? Remember Superman 3? Yes it's Richard Pryor cheesy. Chester Cheetah chessy. It's... it's just really cheesy ok. That stupid Saturday Night Fever getting sequence, the Jazz bar crap, even JJ was painful in this one.
And the fight scenes were just plain lazy. "hmm, we could take the time to make this look really good and convincing, but that would cost a lot of money, just make it go really really fast so people can't tell the difference." If you can tell me what happened during the open Goblin fight then you deserve a medal.
And Harry's butler, where'd they drag this guy from? I've seen some bad acting in my day, but I think they pulled this guy of a used car lot commercial. And none of that scene made any sense! Hey Harry, I know that you and your dad were the Green Goblin, and I totally saw him when he died and his wounds came from his glider, which totally means that he killed himself by accident... and I'm just telling you this now cause it's convenient for the plot, so don't think about how stupid this is, especially sine you get killed by your glider later in the script yet it clearly isn't by your own hand. And what was up with that? He can control his glider with precision accuracy and remote control in the first fight but he can't in the last fight so he jumps in front of it? And not jump in front of it and catch it or knock in out of the way, but he lets it stab him? Bah?
Now there were some good parts, I mean the Sandman was great. That Wings guy got buff, and he did a great job here. So did ChrisTofer Grace as Eddie Brock. Too bad they killed him off before he did anything cool at all. And really they just crammed too much stuff into this movie without caring about making a good film. |
So, I recommend waiting for rental, or stealing it from the interweb. Don't pay $10 for it, or $8.25 like I did to see it in a really crappy theater
